"My list of the top five lies" written for an honors class

My list of the top five lies
Joy Banerjee
Honors Composition

Rev 21:8 "But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth withfire and brimstone: which is the second death."

Lying -- one of the biggest sins in our society. People have been lying all through the ages and there doesnt seem to be an end in sight. Our society is ingrained with the art of lying. It is not possible to survive in this individualistic society without lying, but this is the reason that people dont trust each other anymore. Individuals have different relationships with lying. Some may declare their preference for honesty, or lack awareness about moral problems associated with lying; some are just beyond caring, as ifit is an integral part of them.

Of the many lies people tell, the most harmless is the white lie. A common example of my fifth lie isgiving a false excuse to avoid hurting the feelings of someone making a request or giving an invitation. To illustrate this point, a common lie is the phrase I dont have it. I have heard that phrase usedso many times; I am myself guilty of using it, often to the point that I feel ashamed at times. Although a white lie is harmless by itself, since it doesnt have much moral import, the accumulated effect leads to confusion, misunderstandings and distress. People sometimes forget the white lies they say and blurt out the truth. This is embarrassing for both parties involved. But then most people use white lies so often that they dont realize it.

The fourth lie, which stands out to me, is when people say, I dont know or I dont rememberwhen a question is asked. How annoying is it when you ask someone something and then, although they know the answer, they are too lazy to give a straight answer? Instead they give you a shrug and the awful phrase I dont know! This is perhaps the most widespread phrase among the student populus. As sterile as this statement is, most of us are offended by it if its not true. The I dont rememberusually comes up when people are reminded of their stupid mistakes under the influence of alcohol. I am not sure how drunk people have to be so that they lose conscious control of themselves. Feigning amnesiaand avoiding the truth of their idiocy is generally not very healthy.

I would award the third place to the lies we tell ourselves. The most widespread self lie in our age group would be I am not an alcoholic. I can quit anytime. This is something that every drinker tells himself, but the sad part is that itsalmost always false. Another common addiction that people say they can quit is smoking. I have seen attempts of many of my friends and family members to quit smoking but they have always started again when they take one puff after staying away from it for a long time.One such lie I am guilty of is saying that I am not addicted to my computer and internet because lately I have realized that I am. I am generally never in a good mood when the college internet is down because its one of my outlets for stress during the day plus its the only way I am in contact with my friends and family.Another lie we tell ourselves during school is when we think we are doing fine in academics while actually we are not. This has been an issue with several people I know. They think they can get better after failing in tests and quizzes although inside they know better. It tears me up to see people dejected after being unable to grasp the reality of the consequences of not performing up to par in classes.

And the second place goes to the lies we use for excuses in school. In this category, the rampant lying deals primarily with homework. I have heard some bizarre and downright silly reasons like my dog ate my homework or my baby brother tore it up. The 21^st century version would be my computer crashed or a virus deleted my essay. To be truthful, I have used some excuses in my school life as well, mostly stuff like I was sick or I had a major headache.But then my professor would believe these excuses because it was true most of the time and couldnt differentiate between a fake excuse and the truth because it is so believable. Students also lie about tardiness all the time as well. The world famous I had a flat or my alarm didnt go off seem to be the best reasons for being late, although professors have been able to see past the facade.

Last but not the least, the lie that takes the crown is the lies that women tell others. Most of them are downright hilarious. Age and weight is something they love lying about. Its like they think we are blind or something. When a 200 pound woman says that she is 120 pounds, instead of people believing her, shed be the laughed at. Another thing that amazes me is how women think that people would think they are 40 when they are truly 55. Some lies they use when they dont want to go out with someone is usually something like I am busy that night or my parents are coming over. When questioned about lying, theyd say that they were using feminine guile. So it seems like they have coined a new term for lying and it doesnt seem so bad to them anymore.

Lies range from the Monica Lewinsky/Bill Clinton scandal to the innocuous white lies. One interesting statistics from a leading authority in lying is that women tell four white lies every 15 minutes to mens three. I think lying is okay in a micro level but on the macro scale, a lie is like a ripple that expands and reproduces exponentially as one lie begets another lie. So, a perfect utopian world would not have any lies.

[Listening to: Slip - Lit - Atomic (4:00)]

Today is a day of great sadness for James, my room mate. His grand father passed away last night. I pray for his grandfather to find peace, and I pray for James.

Britta has been sick post homecoming on Saturday. I sent her an ecard. It made her smile. Making her smile makes me smile. I miss her intensely.

It's finally hitting me. Andi will be gone for a long time. I fear if we don't keep in constant touch, we might lose some of our intimacy. It causes me great sadness when I think about her and her immiment departure to Germany. I'm going to miss her more than she knows. Our lives are going to change past this point. I can always hope for some intersection in our diverging curves some time in the future.

I love my friends. I miss my friends.

[Listening to: The Long Goodbye - Ronan Keating - Destination (4:42)]

After a long Friday at work which included the ice cream break, I had a very relaxing evening. I walked around online browsing my daily quota of fodder. Dan Kauffman (link) and I had an interesting discussion about the historic control of internet by the US. And then I talked to Goms for a while till Rachel and Khush walked it and found me talking while lying on the couch. They just laughed at me. I went over to their apartment and hung for a bit. They are moving onto Phase II of the South Beach diet (no carb). They are trying to expunge toxins from their body while losing weight.

As usual, my Saturday started late as usual. James was supposed to have gone to the Cider Mill near Pigeonforge early morning. However he was still sleeping when I woke up. So, Callie joined us while we head to the Cider Mill to check it out. We bought some apple cider, apple butter, glazed apple sourdough bread and semi-sweet apple-raspberry red wine. I am particularly excited about the apple butter and wine. Next time we head out there, we might get other wines that I tasted. We had to get back early evening to go to a beat-the-bull bbq organized by one of the interns at a very nice park area near ORNL. Since no one had to get back home early, we decided to extend out stay longer by playing sand volleyball. It was riot! I could clearly see some people just couldn't play the game but it is understandable since most of them do not play any games/sports involving arm strength. I was extremely surprised to find few of the interns unable to clear the net, even by throwing. Oh well! After getting plenty of sand in my shoes, it was decided that we would reward ourselves for the physical exertion by eating ice cream. Soon after we left for home. I decided to hang out with the girls again and we ended up talking till pretty late in the night. Actually, it was another night that I got to bed post 3.30 am.

So, it ended up another weekend when I woke up late. I got up at 1 pm! After talking to Tara from Coe and studying for the GRE attempting to memorize more words, I got together with Jenn to do inorganic chem. I have all but two questions done. I ate dinner with Rachel, Khush and James at a Mexican restaurant and later shared a pina coloda with Rachel and it turned out to be pretty sweet. That cured by oh-so-frequent sweet urges.

And I write this weekend update after watching desperate housewives with james, jenn and the girls.

Committees of Correspondence

Committees of Correspondence

I agree with Dan. How wise is this investment?

Globetechnology: What's with them young whippersnappers?

Globetechnology: What's with them young whippersnappers?

I don't know whether to be worried or amused. Well, I know these statistics are debatable because people have different values and morals. I know I have different opinions about different things. For example, I detest smoking and think it should be banned. But underage drinking is something I don't have issues with. So, how can you generalize an entire population?

i'm sad that I have to use the native blogger interface or Hello to post pictures on my blog. I would like to have batch file uploading capabilities.. It's extremely time consuming to post 100 or more pictures individually. My picture blog has over 600 pictures now. There are a lot more to come although it seems like the pace of taking pictures since the first few weeks at Oak Ridge has diminished. I haven't done as much recently. Hopefully that will change.

I have a lot of busy work like doing homework for the class, and studying for the GRE. I'm taking the GRE sometime around the end of October. I think Rachel might doing it sometime there too.

So far we don't have much planned for this weekend except for a bbq in honor of one of the Dans getting run over by a bull. Next weekend should be a ton of fun because my brother is coming to visit.

Today has been a productive day so far. I came in at 8.30 and ran AFM scans of the annealed samples that had been in the furnace overnight. And then I conducted a thin film run by myself without my mentor watching me for the first time! We have to run an X ray diffraction scan to check the quality of the thin film. Taking a early quick lunch, I had enough time to put in another sample that should be ready to taken out in half an hour. This should allow me to put a substrate in and create a vacuum in the chamber for Monday. My mentor will be gone all next week and he gave an outline of what he wishes for me to accomplish. He talked about his perception of the right amount of samples and characterization tests needed to write a decent paper worth publishing and it doesn't look like I'll meet the quota. That makes me sad but I can't do much about it because i lose almost 5 hours a week to stuff that I need to do for ORSS which includes the inorganic chem class and a seminar.

I did something fun today post lunch. I took my hour break at work with Jenn and we went to Baskin Robins to get some ice cream. I got a chocolate fudge single scoop cone for $1.50. It was sooo good. I might do that once a week. It reminds me of gelato from Italy. yummmmmmm..

Listening to: [R.E.M. - Try Not To Breathe]

U.S. insists on keeping control of Web

U.S. insists on keeping control of Web

Hmm..I wonder if this is acceptable or not. I do agree that it was a concept built by the US military but it has grown beyond that. The US is being greedy. And like the article says, who is to say that US policy won't suddenly change and our access to the internet severed..

It's really weird that EU needs the US for getting greater control of the internet. It's a worldwide phenomenon now and they should be able to get more access control themselves.. I guess I don't know enough about the situation to understand the problem.

Look at the comments for further discussion on this topic.

My honors paper on The Dying Niobid and Aphrodite of Knidos

I noticed that some people were hitting my blog looking for the dying niobid, so i decided to put up the paper i wrote about the sculpture. FYI: this is not the professor-corrected version, so don't mind the mistakes.

Exploration of female nudes in the Classical and the Hellenistic

The Dying Niobid
Aphrodite of Knidos

The two pieces of sculptures that I will be comparing are The Dying Niobid and Aphrodite of Knidos. The Dying Niobid is a Classical sculpture dated 450-440 BCE. The Aphrodite of Knidos is a Hellenistic piece by Praxiteles during the peak of his career between 330 and 360 BCE. There was a change in values and virtues of Greek culture through the transition from the Classical to the Hellenistic. This was especially true in case of perception of art concerning men and people from other cultures outside Greece. However one thing that did not change was the perception of women in that society. Women were exploited in the Classical era and that continued through to the Hellenistic era in the portrayal of women in sculpture.

The Dying Niobid is the first female nude sculpture found belonging to the Classical period. This piece is clearly Classical with a few innovations such as the nude portrayal. It was a bold move by the unknown sculptor because women were always clothed as nudity corresponded to heroic status. When men were depicted in sculpture, they were nude and larger than life affirming the male dominance of the society. An example of this dominance is the Discobolos by Myron in mid-fifth century BCE which showed an idealized larger than life male who was not self conscious about his nudity. This offers the heroic element to the sculpture. There was no self-consciousness due to the lack of clothing which suggested confidence and vitality.

The primary iconography of the piece suggests pathos since the young Niobid was fleeing from Artemis and was shot in her back with an arrow. That was suggestive of cowardice as no man would have been shot in the back. She stumbles as she is shot in the back and that causes her drapes to fall off. The nude element is accidental as she stumbles and reaches back to pull the arrow out. In the process, she grimaces and throws her head back in a pathetic gesture. This clearly deters the piece from reaching heroic status. We can also see the pain of evident death on her face. She realizes that she is doomed and fated to die. Her form is Classical as the piece depicts rhythmos due to symmetry in motion. Her right arm and left thigh are on a vertical line, so there is symmetry on the vertical axis. Her extended right thigh is balanced by her arms reaching for her back. She also forms a triangle which provides with a certain sense of stability because Classical sculpture was about order and reason. Stability in the form was very important. This was also about the momentary as it was depiction of frozen motion, a still image in the process of the young Niobid stumbling.

The artist was playing around with new ideas but he still had various constraints regarding form and iconography. Women had not been depicted nude in the Classical era due to their inferior status in society. The sculptor balanced the nudity in the piece by showing her in the process of dying. Dying can be shown in a heroic manner but the artist goes further to deprive her of heroic status by showing her getting shot in the back as she runs away cowardly from her pursuer. He balanced the piece because the public of that era would not appreciate the novelty of female nudity. The portrayal of death in a woman who is vulnerable and defeated depreciated the value of the female Niobid. The piece conformed to the ideals of Greek society during that period.

The young Niobid was unselfconscious of her nudity as she was more concerned with the arrow in her back. This caused her to gaze upwards as she fished around for the arrow. This allows us to gaze at her accidental nudity freely. This brings a voyeuristic element to the piece and suggests a certain level of eroticism. This eroticism borders on pornography because it provides the male viewer sexual pleasure while looking at it. The pornographic element in this piece is ghastly with the portrayal of death. It is similar to snuff pornography in the modern world where the subject or victim is murdered brutally on film after having sex.

The Dying Niobid acknowledged the male dominance in the society as the male viewer had the control of interpreting the piece the way he wanted. He could either look at it erotically or look at it with disgust. He could derive pleasure from viewing the topless Niobid or be sickened by the pathos during the last moments of her death. Either way, this showed that women were still exploited and would not be given equal status in society. Men could be heroes but women would not be given the status. They would be almost heroic and then the artist would do something to the piece to deprive them of the heroic element. Women were shown as soft, delicate and vulnerable, which was not heroic.

The Aphrodite of Knidos was a trend setting piece as there were many versions of Aphrodite created later. This was a piece of Hellenistic sculpture as the iconography shown here is as simple as a bath. The piece shows Aphrodite nude with her right hand covering her pubic area with her left hand holding on to a drape over a water vase. Her head is also turned to the left. She is emerging or getting ready for a bath. This is a very private moment that we are witnessing. This piece does not have a heroic element in it either due to the selfconsciousness of her nudity.

The pose of Aphrodite was contrapposto which is defined by American Heritage� Dictionary as �The position of a figure in painting or sculpture in which the hips and legs are turned in a different direction from that of the shoulders and head; the twisting of a figure on its own vertical axis.� She has her right hip cocked to the side with most of her weight on her right foot. It�s a casual stance which is more comfortable that the rigid straight posture. This casual posture alleviates strain. However she is balanced with her extended left arm and hand. This pose conveys ease in posture yet reassuring stability. This is very similar to the Doryphoros. Her pose is more supple, feminine, and not athletic because she is stooping a little. This made her nude feminine form different from the athletic yet casual stance of the male Doryphoros. However a key difference in the two pieces is that the male Doryphoros is not self conscious about his nudity.

The line form of the Aphrodite is S-shaped which induces sensuality to the image. Plaxiteles used the bath as a pretext for nudity. She is self conscious about her nudity. This is perhaps due to her privacy being invaded by a male gaze. She quickly moves to cover her private areas in a gesture of modesty. Her posture is coy which makes this image of Aphrodite erotic. This piece was made for a male gaze. This voyeurism makes this image pornographic too. Her failed attempt to be modest makes it more erotic because it makes us wonder about what�s hidden. However, since her gaze is not straight but looking off to the left, we are allowed to view her nudity freely without feeling uncomfortable.

There are similarities between The Dying Niobid and the Aphrodite of Knidos. They have a certain sense of order. Both of them are balanced, inducing order into the sculptures. This makes the Aphrodite of Knidos pseudo classical. They are both nude but without the trait of heroism. The Niobid is portrayed with pathos as she stumbles. Aphrodite is shown in a private moment doing something as trivial as a bath. Both the female nudes are looking away which allows the viewer to scan her body at his pace without feeling uncomfortable. An interesting observation is that the build of both nudes are similar. It�s rather fascinating to see that the image of a sensual female body had not changed. The voyeuristic element in both the female nudes gives control to the male viewer. This shows the exploitation of women because men thought women were inferior to them. They made women seem like mere sex objects.

Since these pieces are produced in contrasting eras, they have some fundamental differences. They have different forms as the form of the Niobid is more rigid and ordered. The Niobid is also not conscious about her nudity while Aphrodite is clearly conscious of her nudity as she moves to preserve her modesty. Another difference is that the Niobid is shown performing a pathetic gesture while Aphrodite is merely in a bath. Mortal women were likely to be shown more pathetic and vulnerable than goddesses.

Since neither of these pieces are heroic and are suggestively erotic, it portrays the status of women as lowly. They were not allowed to be equal to men. We have not been witness to any male nudes that were meant to be erotic. This is due to the fact that most of the sculptures were made for rich male aristocrats who looked down upon women. When the artists created these masterpieces, they were subject to constraints in art during the particular era. During the Classical era, the nude female was not a permissible theme when the male nude form was evolving. So, they had to create abnormal states for the female subject to make her nude. However, even with relaxation of that form of prejudice, Praxiteles felt like he had to justify Aphrodite�s nudity by using the premise of a bath. They were not allowed to show women as heroes due to possible public outrage. So, they condoned the male dominance by creating images of women which were meant to serve as high class pornography further subjugating women.

Reference:

1. The Aphrodite of Knidos and Her Successors: A Historical Review of the Female Nude in Greek Art. Christine Mitchell Havelock. University of Michigan Press.


2. Greek Sculpture: A Critical Review. Rhys Carpenter. University of Chicago Press.

and the emergency vehicles are still there. they also have the whole building cordoned off. great! there goes my productive work for the day. sigh. i have a seminar to attend in an hour and then it's home. i have to finish reading the first two chapters of Molecular Symmetry and Group Theory which talks about the symmetry elements in point group theory. If you couldn't figure out already, this is a part of advanced inorganic chemistry. And of course, I also have to do GRE prep.

Listening to: [The Starting Line - The B-List]

Excitement at ORNL!

Well, my mentor and I were almost to the point that we could start the laser ablation (PLD) and then we smelt something nasty. And we looked around to locate the origin of the odor and then we hear sirens. We then got out of the lab to see lights flashing and the people getting out. And as we went down the stairs, we noticed that the first floor was full of smoke. And then within 2 mins, the ORNL fire department and emergency vehicles pulled up. That was quick response! After we got out, we asked around to see anyone knew what the smoke was from. Once the firemen got out with a black burnt hunk of metal, we realize that it was a smoking tube furnace. I'm told that we might not be able to operate any tube furnaces for a while. That's a kink in our productivity because I still need to anneal substrates and don't want any setbacks. My mentor told me that Los Alamos had a bad laser accident and they shut down all the lasers in the lab for two months. That must have really slowed their scientific research down because a lot of science research is done by lasers. They are trying to figure out if the smoke was toxic or not. I guess we will be told soon enough. I've been told that safety is a serious issue at ORNL and it should be. Our division now has a ton of paper work to fill out about this and has deal with possible repercussions..

Lets see what happens now. We need to get back into the lab to finish my thin film growth.

Listening to: [Aqualung - Good Times Gonna Come]

Hugh Symonds - Hu's Gallery in the Sky

Hugh Symonds - Hu's Gallery in the Sky

This is amazing! These pictures have fantastic quality. I never knew camera phones took pictures like these. I know my motorola V710 doesn't. It actually has a pretty crappy camera phone.

i was threatened with bodily harm for logging onto someone's computer. i don't think i did anything wrong except for etiquette. i shouldn't have used his computer but it was right there and i was getting bored while substrates were being cut. he said that if i ever did it again, he would break my fingers. geez, that's one abrasive guy. he is a huge hulk looking piece of meat. i know ORNL has strict rules against physical harm but I don't know if this is worth reporting. i know i'm never logging onto his computer anymore. but if i did, which i won't, i would log on and then remove my user id upon restart. i think putting in his user id and then putting a wrong password resets the user id field back to his. my mentor apologized to me for his rudeness. oh well, that's some excitement for today.

i'm in a weird productive mood today. i have to cut more substrates and then clean them. i also need to etch and anneal them. i have a lot to do this week.

i had a lot of fun at the balloon festival on friday evening. and the country concert was decent too. i am going to put up pictures soon.

i got caught up with everything going on at school because i got to talk to britta, kelly and goms. i chatted with andi for a bit and i'm going to call her tonight and talk to her. i haven't talked to andi for a week now because i've been soo busy.. sounds like she had a cracker of a weekend. i'm jealous.

The Amazon.Com Customer Service Page

The Amazon.Com Customer Service Page

This has phone numbers and such for customer service. Another useful site.

Database of voice-jail shortcuts to speak to humans at big companies

Find-A-Human -- IVR Phone S... - Approved

This is a handy resource.

The Real-Life Twinkie Experiment: August 2005

The Real-Life Twinkie Experiment: August 2005

This is one of the most interesting real life experiments I've ever seen bordering on fraud. I thought this happened only in movies but it seems like they have been doing this for a couple of months and gotten away with it so far. The twin at the law school seems to be doing fine so far. I'm going to keep up with this and see how long the facade lasts.

Cheers!

This is midly amusing

I think someone actually is reading my blog. I am amused because I know where the reader is from. Oh well, another spectator for the ride. I wonder how long they are going to be with us.. They must have tagged my blogs to check for updates. This is cool! I wonder if I will get any comments.

And I did an AFM run of LaAlO3 and didn't realize that it was supposed to be rough and thereby I wouldn't get any fine features. I sat there for 30 mins trying to figure out why I couldn't see the terrace features. And then I looked at the sample and thought that the surface was pretty rough as I could see features with my eyes. So essentially after talking to my mentor, I found out that I got exactly what I needed. I just have to increase the z scale to see more macroscopic features. And that also explained the reduced amplitude setpoint. There is so much to learn about the AFM and I have just stratched the surface. I have quite a few samples to do Monday morning.

[Listening to: Harry_and_the_Potters-Stick_it_to_Do - Harry and the Potters - Voldemort Can't Stop the Rock! (2:23)]

Lab Notes: Research from the Berkeley College of Engineering

Lab Notes: Research from the Berkeley College of Engineering

This is a short article on Berkeley's new optical microscope that has a resolution of 60 nm which is amazing. Yeah, the AFM has a resolution of a few nano meter but this is an actual image. This is very promising!

A selection of pictures that I really like

These are just a few pictures that I took over the past two weeks while at Oak Ridge. I am proud of them because I think they came out pretty well. They were taken with a Canon Powershot A80.

Click on the pictures to enlarge

It's been over 3 weeks already!

I've been thinking about my exprerience here so far. I am amazed to see how quickly time is flying by. Getting up for work around 6.45-7 am everyday, then 8 hours of research at the lab except when I have the tuesday thursday Advanced Inorganic Chemistry for an hour and a half in the morning, and the mandatory Wednesday afternoon seminar on various scientific topics. So usually have long days and then workout in the evening for an hour. I can't really do much here except for running and pushups and crunches and stuff. I get pretty tired after running for 20 mins. Must be the altitude and the speed I try to sustain. I guess I'm spoilt running on the treadmill at Coe which keeps me in check.

About the progress in research so far. I guess I have made a few Bi based oxide thin films using PLD. Apart from that I've learnt how to use the tapping mode in the AFM. The AFM i'm using is very similar to the one we have at Coe Physics except, Coe's is newer. And the images I've scanned have had a 50-50 clarity consistency. Must be the tip. I keep thinking that I've broken the tip by getting it too close to the surface. Ho Nyung, my mentor thinks that after scanning a hundred samples, I'll become an expert. Probably true. I think he is moulding my project differently that what he had planned earlier. He says that he plans for me to use the AFM a lot. I haven't done any X-ray diffraction yet.

And I talked to Andi at the perfect time on Sunday. I wanted to talk to someone about something I had learned about myself from Jenn. Andi just listened and it made it feel better. It was about how I can be demanding sometimes especially when it came to food. Jenn and James cook every time and I can't really help because I have nothing constructive to help with the process except cutting veggies and dishes. And our kitchen is soo small, it can barely hold two people in it. And the way, I phrase my requests that sounds like commands and not requests to people here. I guess that is true because we have not known each other for long enough to get comfortable enough to rid formalities. I went into the mode that I am with friends from school like Britta and Andi and such. So, I just have to careful how I say things now. I guess it will be little hard to pay attention to everything but it will work out. I like the fact that Jenn told me because I would have been oblivious to this and would have continued my lack of courteousness in my interactions. It not like I am not courteous, I just don't say please all the time.. Just one thing, people here don't really communicate as to how they feel to the person they need to talk to the most. Except for Jenn. I'm glad for her honesty with me. People are having serious room mate issues and are bitching about it to other people but when suggested to talk to their roomie, they shrug and say they don't want to confront the situation. I know that people aren't veyr observant of change in behavior, and they will never know unless they are told. I hope the girls figure out and solve their issues. On the other hand, so far James and I are doing great. He is a good friend and room mate.

I got wonderful news from Britta. She is going to be around for my final semester because she is not doing her study abroad in Sweden. It makes me soo happy. I miss her a lot. One of the very few people I had to see everyday. She will be there for my graduation.

[Listening to: Harry_and_the_Potters-Stick_it_to_Do - Harry and the Potters - Voldemort Can't Stop the Rock! (2:23)]

Blogging has been on the back burner

I wish i was blogging more frequently. I am perpetually busy ever since I've been at Oak Ridge. My 40 hours of research at Oak Ridge National Lab (I'm going to refer to this as ORNL from now), an inorganic chemistry course and a weekly seminar series along with GRE prep keeps my time occupied. I am a part of the HERE-ORSS program (ACM/GCLA) which is sort of like an internship and I would highly recommend this to anyone who has a semester to take off and participitate in this. This would boost your graduate application beyond your wildest expectations. I went to Vanderbilt University to visit the VINSE (Vanderbilt Institute of Nanoscale Science and Engineering) and check out their programs. I was able to meet a few of their professors and talk to them about their interdisclipnary material science graduate program and research centres. They have a brand new 3 million dollar facility for nano science research including PLD (Pulsed Laser Depostion which I will talk about more later since I work at ORNL on that), carbon nano tubes, nano fluidics, nano fabrication, and nano optics to name a few. I don't know much about Nashville but I'm assuming that if I am called back for an interview, I will be able to see more of what the city and the college has to offer. So, far I think Vanderbilt is ok and they have a decent cafeteria.. They asked me to come down for their Nano Day on Oct 19 where I would be able to meet most of their faculty and students. Jenn came along with me to Vandy because she wanted to check out the Bio-Chem division, and she got to talk to a few professors too. She said that one was almost cocky about his publications/research and hated teaching because for some odd reason, they don't get paid for teaching yet they have to teach a class. Anyway, the ride up and down was a ton of fun and we talked most of the way. We listened to one of her time management and motivational cds and had a discussion which eventually went off on a tangent and we never got back to what we were talking initially..hehe..

We might go to a few other universities to check them out. I guess we'll see.

Updated Picture Blog!

I finally put up pictures starting from mid July. This includes the trip down to Tennessee and pictures of some of my friends here.. Go to Joy�s Odds N Ends and check �em out! I have a few pictures that I am really proud of too..

last day with andi

i have been sleeping on the couch since this week began. And tonight will be the last night on the couch. Andi, her mum and their exchange student leave early tomorrow from Batavia. I got some apartment stuff filled out and got my keys. I also met James my room mate for the next four months. He is a very polite and pleasant guy. I've been chatting with him pretty often before I got to Oak Ridge.. Andi, and her family along with me went to Gatlinberg which is supposed to be an artsy fartsy place. Before we hit Gatlinberg we did a picnic at the Smoky Mountains National Park. Well, it was going fine until the part when i slipped and fell into the water with my cell phone and camera in my pocket. i was stupid not to leave my cell phone out before I started walking around on the rocks.. anyway, the camera didnt get soaked for more than a second but the cell phone took some water. eventually after drying it started working again but it gave me a scare because i didn't want to buy another cell phone just yet..And of course, i was completely soaked. And I'm not totally dry yet. I did dry my socks and my shoes got a little drier when i put them under onee of those automatic drying machines in the rest rooms..we went to a few art and craft stores in gatlinberg but didn't buy anything. I was given a small bear made by an American Indian as a gift. I took a few pictures of the first wolf i've ever seen. and then we just walked around downtown. i disliked all the touristy stores selling the exact same things..the weird part was seeing nice stores by not so nice stores..and then there were these stores which had hard core christian shirts surrounded by sleazy dirty shirts.. just catering to the needs of the tourists..and now as i write, we are heading back to oak ridge..it's been a fun day. i really liked the national park with the water and the rocks..

i do have quite a few pictures to put up. i might go wardriving to put them up if need be ;)..

en route to oak ridge

my trip down to tennessee began on monday at 4 pm instead of the planned 2 pm. Andi and her family got held up in traffic because there was a big accident on the way here. we went by the accident on the way back and saw the traffic held up for 3-4 miles. I felt sorry for the people who were stuck. After a few hours we got to St. Louis where we stayed for a couple of nights. We spent the day at St. Louis visiting the Arch and the Budweiser factory. We spent a lot of time at the musuem underneath the Arch. I learnt more about US history there as they had a year by year info block. I took a few pictures. I actually figured out the exposure setting to take low light images of stationary objects. They came out pretty well actually, atleast on the small LCD display on my camera. After this, we did a quick lunch at the parking lot near the Arch. This was the steepest slope I've seen for a parking area. It was mildy scary to park.. And then we did the oen thing that people would be most jealous about. The tour and free beer at the Budweiser headquarters and factory. The tour was about an hour long and I learnt about the methods of preparation of their beer. I didn't know that their beer contained no preservatives and was naturally carbonated..And at the end of the tour, we got to try two free samples of any of their beer. I really liked their AmberBock. It;s a little darker but it was good. And then I got a honorary beer taster certificate for taking part in their little test to show us the difference between fresh beer and expired beer. And so that was my souvenir from the Bud factory.. And then we went to the Union Station and looked around and did dinner there. After that we head back tired and that was the day. And today we have been driving all day and we got stuck in a traffic clog here Nashville for an hour in torrential downpour. It rained quite a bit today while driving. Mrs. Ziffer is the only one who can drive so we feel sad for her to take such a burden to drive all the way.. I guess I have a few pictures so far from this trip that I'll post when i get the chance.. And tomorrow we visit Gatlinburg and then they leave friday morning.. And after that it's new people..

i leave coe in 12 hours

as i try to go to bed, and think about leaving coe for a semester to participate in the Oak Ridge Science Semester, I have mixed feelings. I feel happy about the new experience that i'm going to have. i feel sad that i won't see my friends for so long. i am worried about a new place with unfamiliar surroundings and people. i feel dissappointed that i couldn't spend the amount of time I wanted with some people that I wanted to reconnect with. i feel anxious about the first few weeks at the lab.

and i am feeling all of this at once.

[Listening to: Holiday - The Get Up Kids - Something To Write Home About (3:29)]

SongMeanings | lyrics | Alexi Murdoch - Orange Sky

SongMeanings | lyrics | Alexi Murdoch - Orange Sky

This is such a soothing song!

I love this piece of glass I made. This is a lithium borate R=0.4 with reduced gold mixed in it. I especially like the bubbles.. 

what a summer it has been so far. i can't imagine how quickly it has gone by. but then, why won't it seem like that? with everything that has been going on, it's only natural to feel that way. this is my last summer here. italy, visiting family and friends, hanging out with friends at Coe, keeping in touch with buddies who are elsewhere, travelling to get stuff done. I haven't much downtime really. And now I will be leaving Coe for a semester. leaving familiar grounds into the unknown to be around people i have never met. and it's bound to be the most novel experience during my coe career. doing research with nationally renowned scientist in a field that has such tremendous potential in the future is a luxury a few people have especially undergrads like me. this semester should get me well on the way to grad school as it will show me the inner working of research in nano technology. maybe i am expecting too much from this semester. all i know is that i am going to work hard. harder than i have ever worked before to get the most of this invaluable oppurtunity.

but this summer has not been all highs. the lows have been pretty trivial though. the friendship that turned sour is still sour and there isn't anyway that is getting fixed either. oh well. even though our friendship was so short lived, I'm glad that i got to know her. And of course, the other failed attempt to a new friendship. I think my first failed attempt ever! i have no idea what happened. it happened in the beginning of research and i thought time would help. no! what i realized was that never let anything fester over time, it doesn't get better with time either. I did try to fix it by talking and apologizing but that didn't work. Well, what else can I do? So, i guess it's out of my control. It's a good thing I haven't had a lot of downtime. It kept me from thinking and rethinking about these things. well, i'm a ponderer.

which brings me to another thing i'm hoping i will not ponder over. All the people I will miss next semester and year, and perhaps beyond. I will be seeing Andi some more over the next 3 weeks. I won't see Britta till December when i get back from Oak Ridge. Same with Sean, Kelly, and Hannah. I will see Komal when she gets back for RA training. I am going to miss my friends a lot because IM and phone is not the same as seeing them in person. No more late nights with Britta. After 10 days, no more swing with Andi. We brought out the best in each other. It's hard to imagine that I won't see Andi for such a long time. My first love. But hey, I did make a few new acquaintances. A few freshmen.

All I need to do at Oak Ridge and beyond is watch what i say. First impressions are important. I can't afford to be awkward with anyone at Oak Ridge. But I will be my friendly self.

Pictures from Italy!

They are finally up. Go check em' out. I posted about 135 images. Joy's Odds N Ends

Do it!

and my time in italy is coming to an end

it's almost time to get back to school. it's been a fantastic trip. i will put up more detailed accounts once i get it typed. and of course around 200 pics. i should get back to school early evening on friday and then i have the weekend to get back into the groove of things and acclimatized..

till this weekend, cya!

italia!

Bonjourno from Italia! We got here 4 days back and it's been a blast since then. Fantastic food, magnificient sights and sounds and Venice! I don't have much time now but I'll write in detail when i get more time on the computer.. hopefully that's soon! i have a ton of pics to put up when i get back. Borate Conference 2005 in Trento, Italy starts today with the reception tonight.. time for the work to begin..

it's good to be connected to the web again! damn, i'm addicted. my one addiction!

So smoking is allowed on flights under special circumstances

Courtesy: This is Broken

June 30, 2005

Broken: Ashtrays on planes

Alexander Moseson writes:

I recently took a Delta Airlines trip on an Airbus A321. The cheesy video at the beginning of the flight said "No Smoking." The overhead lights said "No Smoking." Several other signs said "No Smoking."

Yet there are ashtrays located in the lavatory, and in the aisle above the trashcan, and probably other places, too, for your smoking convenience. I asked a flight attendant about this, and she explained that the ashtrays were left in place incase a smoker had a panic attack and needed to smoke while in flight.

Whoa! What the hell! I guess that should be allowed but then we will be breathing second hand smoke for the rest of the flight. Well, but then we will also be saving a life just so it is shortened at the end of his/her life. That's irony!

muah laptop!

I just bought a Dell Inspiron 6000. Specs: 1.86 Ghz Pentium M, 60 GB Hard drive, 1 GB RAM, 128 MB ATI graphics card, DVD DL burner, with a spare 9 cell battery and a 3 year Accident coverage.

What I need now is a laptop case (Case Logic Koskin Notebook Case, KNC2 ) which i tracked at walmart.

and in the future, a wireless networking router. I also need to buy an external hard drive for my music and other data files!

NUMBER27 / WordCount Conspiracy

NUMBER27 / WordCount Conspiracy

This is pretty interesting too!

To-do list of sorts

1. Finish my poster for Trento


2. Finish my paper for Trento (this is almost done)


3. Send in final ORSS app


4. Clean and organize my room


5. Work on my new laptop when I get it


6. Try to salvage a couple of friendships(this'll take a while and/or might not happen)


7. Call Sunny


8. Call Andi


9. Figure out what's up with Doll. I haven't talked to her for a couple of months now..


10. Finish A Brief History of Nearly Everything by Bill Bryson( this is a wonderful book. a must read.)


11. Figure out how and when to get up to Manhattan to see my family. Before Trento.

Well, this is as far as I can remember. I'll add to it when I have to do more things.

Culmination of my summer research

I spent the last month and a half writing up this article that needs to get published and a poster presentation for Trento. This is the final product after lots and lots of editing!

My article titled "A solution approach to high alkali content borate glasses" and my poster presentation with the same title which is a summary of the paper with prettier graphs..

Thinking of good times..

This weekend has been different. I did stuff but then I had a lot of time to myself too. This is the first weekend when my roomies weren't around all the time. I could have asked people to come over and hang out. But I took a lot of alone time instead. Sean, Britta and me saw Bewitched on Friday. It was relatively good.. We got back and hung out at Sean's till 3 am and then I left to go sleep. Saturday, Jojo and me were supposed to hang out but that didn't happen. Instead I spent time playing around with my brand new Dell Inspiron 6000, and installing software on it. Kelly came by later in the evening and then we went to eat to Nothing But Noodles which was good. Another one of those non-date dates. We caught up with things happening in our lives. We bumped into Sean and Britta at Best Buy and then hung out there and the mall till 9. We rented After the Sunset which we watched later after getting back. It was a bad movie, why would directors make such movies?!?! After they left, I was awake till 2am and around that time, Kristin walked into my room because she didn't think I would still be awake. Hehe..I was. We talked for a while and hung out till 3 am with Catie. When I woke up in the morning, I saw that I had messages from Sunny that she was close to Cedar Rapids and she wanted to eat with me. I was so excited to see her again. Me and Kristin met them at Fiesta Del Sol and ate lunch with Sunny, Alex, her sister and dad. It was fun. They came back to our apartment and we hung out for a while before they left. Apart from that nothing much has happened today. I hung out with Sean too for a while. I wish I could have seen Britta today but she didn't really have time to see me..Big news for this weekend is that two of my friends are dating again. I knew it was coming and I am happy for them. Lucky!

Now to what I really wanted to blog about. Bewitched had a nice soundtrack which included some good jazz/swing songs. I heard them and missed Andi a lot. I love dancing with her. We are so incredibly compatible in swing. We can do stuff that only we can do with each other. I hear swing music and always think of her. One of my favorite songs to dance to is Bobby Darin's Beyond the Sea. We always request that song when we go to the Top of the Five.. So, the one thing that will always remind me of her is swing apart from her big beautiful smile.. Look at our pictures together and you see what I mean about her smile..

In short, I still miss her.

This is Britta and Sean in case you were wondering who they are:

i just uploaded some pics on Joy's Odds and Ends. Check em out!

[Listening to: Symbiont - Celldweller - Celldweller (5:27)]

a mixed sort of day

I didn't have a very good day at research. Doc might be a little dissappointed or frustrated with me or both. I think I should do better. *sigh* I think my paper is pretty good now. But it took quite a lot of work. And he thought I should have been more attentive to details and been more critical of my own writing. What he doesn't realize is that I am critical of my writing. I know when it's mediocre. But I worked on it. And it got better with a little guidance. Anyway, I have to finish up my poster presentation that I will be doing at the Borate Conference 2005 in Trento, Italy. I think I'm mostly done with that too. A lot of it was cut and paste from the paper i wrote. I'll put the paper and presentation up sometime too.. And then asked me if I wanted to stop work because he didn't think I could do much after Italy. I guess that's sort of true. I don't have enough time for an independent project but I can do something else. He wants me to start my honor's thesis writing. That's a good idea. And I'm not going to Canada. Italy is good enough anyway.

And then I came back and worked out. I could do only 1.25 miles before I had to stop because I had side stitches again! But that's after 4 days of no exercising. I guess it was coming. I did get in a lot of weights. I did more that usual. And then played racquetball with Sean. That was good. And to end the evening, I spent a couple of hours with Jessi hanging out and drinking Jasmine tea in her chinese tea set. It was good to see and talk to her. I introduced her to PostSecret and she loved it. She is also incredibly tanned from nannying the kids because she is taking them to swim. I was amazed! Anyway after 20 mins of word association with her, I came up so that she could go to bed. And I have been chilling in my room since. And swapping covers with Megan. hehe..

I suppose that is a decent update for today..I need to call Andi sometime.

[Listening to: Rhythm Made Me Do It - Shania Twain - Send It... With Love (3:51)]

PostSecret selections from June 19, 2005

I wish for that all the time!

Courtesy: Postsecret

[Listening to: Breathe In - Frou Frou - Details (4:28)]

A weekend in Chicago

I had to go up to Chicago to apply for an Italian visa in person. That was incredibly annoying. This has been the most assanine consulate/embassy i have dealt with. So after panicking a bit figuring out how to get there and when to go up, I found out that Chris was going up to Chicago to see his sister performing in a reggae band. I also called Andi and made sure that she and her family was ok with my staying with them for the weekend. It was fine, I knew it would be because her family really likes me :)!

         So, I left on Friday at 6 much to the dissappointment of Britta due to the fact that we couldn't hang out this weekend. And of course, something had to go wrong. Chris never read his directions, so we missed the highway we were supposed to be on completely and only realized that we were not going in the right direction after I called Andi. That was funny but it made Chris and his girlfriend miss the concert and they turned into a taxi service just for me. that might go on the good ones list! Anyway, I got to Batavia, and Andi and her mum picked me up. The weekend passed being quite mellow. I didn't do much. I came in too short a notice for Andi to drop her jobs.. Next time, things should be more planned. We did spend some time together, although I wish we could have spent some more.. I was kinda dissapointed when we couldn't go swing dancing on sunday to the lake front thing, but i got over it and we went shopping and biking instead. maybe i'll head up there sometime again and we can do it then. we thought magaret(andi's sis) and her bf to swing last night. I did do a little bit of swing with her which was great because I miss it and her a lot!

         Of course, the visa adventure. I go up there by train and then walk to the consulate. it was a wonderful day, so the walk was great! The moment i get up to the consulate, i see that it's a small office setting. that's the smallest diplomatic office i've ever seen. hehe.. he said that i didn't have the right paper work and i need more things. Well, i would have brought them if they had responded to my email or fax about it. I even tried to call them. Those damn fools! They don't even take calls. What the hell is up with that? So eventually after getting my bank statement and then getting my medical insurance faxed to them, he is satisfied. He said that it will take a week to process. I hope it get to me soon because I need it in a couple of weeks.. I spent the rest of the time there walking around. I ate at an Israeli restaraunt with Andi's dad who works in downtown Chicago. After that I went to the Virgin Megastore and the Millenium Park. I walked around Mich Ave too. I have pictures that I will put up soon. Andi dropped me off today morning at the greyhound station and then waited with me the whole time till the bus came. I was happy that she came and saw me off. Although that made her miss her morning run, I hope she was able to go later.. I atleast I got quite a few hugs in this weekend. The hug quota is satisfied for another few days. lol!

The trip back to Cedar Rapids was long but I tried to sleep most of the way. Greyhound would be fine if it didnt take so much of time. It took me 7 hours to get to Cedar Rapids instead of the normal 3.5 hrs. But I got to walk around downtown Iowa City during the lay over there..

And I'm back now. I can sleep in my own bed. I re arranged my room somemore. And I hung out with Britta and Sean. So, I've had a good long day. I hope the rest of the week goes fine. I have a lot of work ahead in my presentation and paper for the conference.. Let's see what tomorrow brings. And tomorrow's Wednesday lunch is Indian food! yay!

[Listening to: Come Downstairs And Say Hello - Guster - Keep It Together (5:16)]

My selections from this week's PostSecret

Another one of those pee-poop ones..






I hope this worked...

PostSecret

Bloopers from Glass research at Coe College

While Calibrating DSC

Doc: So, how�s the baseline coming?
Grant: It still has the large curve.
Doc: Well, did it shift at all?
Grant: No, it�s the same as last time��.
That�s because we didn�t change it.


Mario: I don�t like the sound of the beads sitting around for a
few days.
Brad: Well what do you want me to do with them?
Jim: Desicatize the beads.
Brad: Is that a word?
Mario: That is why my students need more english classes.



Doc: Where�s Trent?
Student: What time is it?
Doc: 10:30 a.m.
Student: Well he isn�t expected for another half hour.



Sagnik: I love polishing, La la La la la. I will go check my email.
Jim: (by the polisher) Boy, this is wet here, what the hell is going on, did I do something?
Sagnik: (in computer lab) I love email, I don�t have any worries in the world when I check my email.
Mario: What the hell is this? Why is there water spewing all over my lab�.. Sagnik!!!


(Grant & Allen trying to roller quench, but something is wrong)
Grant: Doc, something is wrong with the roller quencher.
Doc: Well who used it last?
Allen: Biswas and Kristen were the last to use it.
(Doc talking to Biswas and Kristin)
Doc: So, did you use the roller quencher?
Biswas: No, it was not me.
Kristen: Yeah, I used it earlier this morning.
Doc: Well what did you do?
Kristen: I did �(proceeds to tell Doc what she did), Jim is the one who taught me how to use it.
Doc: Ah, Now I know why.*
*Not all text is historically accurate




(Just a regular day, and Biswas needs to use the roller quencher for his sample)
Biswas: Doc really must trust me to let me do research all on my own without Trent babysitting me.
(Biswas proceeds to prepare to quench his sample, he even practices a few times to help his speed)
Biswas: Okay, let�s do this..(Biswas opens the furnace and with lightning speed pulls his sample out and empties it into the roller quencher)
Biswas:Yeah,,, that�s what I�m talkin �bout.
(Soon after Biswas�s world crashes around him as he notices he never turned on the roller quencher and his sample is just sitting there, cooling on top of the rollers)

(Jim is preparing to do z-mapping on a sample he just got done blasting with a laser, he is extremely excited because one, he got to play with a laser and two, he is learning how to z-map)
Tim: Do you know where in the sample there is damage?
Jim: Yeah, (as he is pulling the glass out of the envelope) There is a crack down the middle because upstairs we�.(he stutters randomly about his project) But at least the sample is still intact.
(Jim drops the sample and it breaks on the table below him)
Jim: Damn, at least it was intact.

If you have questions about the stuff involved. Leave comments and I'll clarify.
There will be more. And I'll put them up as them come! Cheers!

Start Small

The best way to go about it is to start with baby steps. Try running half a mile and then start increasing distance as you get more comfortable with running. Music helps me take my mind off the fact that I’m getting tired. It helps me focus on something different. One pointer is to stretch before and after. You’ll be able to run better and then feel less sore later..

See more progress on: Start running

And so the summer begins

I guess a lot has happened since the last time I blogged. I moved out of my home of a year and into an apartment with 3 girls. My parents were mildly curious because they thought I might have an interesting time sharing a bathroom with a girl. hehe..I don't think there is anything I haven't seen, so I shouldn't be caught unawares or embarrassed. The reason why I am living with these three girls is Kristin. I haven't seen for a year and I thought we could catch up and hang out to make up lost time. She is also one of my best friends. So far, I haven't done much with her. She hangs out a lot with Dana who is probably her best friend here. So, it's a little hard to get her by herself except for a couple of hours every other day. I hope we get to actually talk sometime. I think that would be nice. Sharing living space with three people is interesting because it's all about compromise and patience. We have communal food and personal food. That's a good thing because we don't eat the same food. Kristin is also the only one who can actually cook. So, I've had a few cooked meals with her. I suppose that's good for the people in the apartment.

More about the apartment and my room.. The apartment has 4 individual bed rooms(duh!), two restrooms(one with a bathtub and one without), a common big kitchen which comes furnished, and a living room. It's a big apartment and I like the space. It's a vast difference from my single last year. Mind you, I loved my single. I got tons of privacy and didn't have to worry about having guests in my room till late. hehe..that's for people in the likes of Britta ;). But I still get a single bed room which is good because most of my stuff is in there. I am still in the process of unpacking because I have a ton of stuff. It took me two days with the help of three people and their cars. I think the funniest part of moving was my entertainment centre strapped on top of Jake's Cherookee. The last day of moving, we had a tornado warning go off as i got done moving. I was on the phone with Andi at the time sirens went off and I had to hang up quick and run back to the apartment in the pouring rain. And ofcourse as usual, we had to hang out in the basement till the warning expired. Since, the caf was not open anymore after May term ended, I had to eat out the next few days. I had too much of wendy's and taco bell for a weekend. I went out and got groceries worth a 100 bucks. I still have them after a couple of weeks, so it's money well spent for the most part. I also bought a 1 gb flash drive and a mouse because I had been using a borrowed mouse for over a year.

So, ends this saga of moving..

Google shares surge to new highs after stock report | CNET News.com

Google shares surge to new highs after stock report | CNET News.com


I feel stupid, stupid, stupid for not buying shares! Well, I suppose I had more money to invest. I'm a poor college student after all. LOL!

PostSecret

Hehe. Brilliant!


Courtesy: PostSecret

PostSecret

Beautiful sentiment.

Courtesy:
PostSecret

PostSecret

This is even better!! I know how he feels.

Courtesy

PostSecret

PostSecret

I think this is really funny.

Courtesy:PostSecret

Today has been one of the most boring days ever. Well, maybe not ever. I can remember worse. I have done absolutely nothing. Hardly any of my friends are around. There are times when I want to be alone but there are people around and when I want to hang out, they aren't there. One of my friends says that we always want things that we can not have. I have watched a lot of tv and been downloading rare tracks online. The rare tracks and covers were the highlights of my day so far.
      I've been thinking about the possible trips abroad next year. Amar bondu ke dekte jetam kintu akun jani na, janina jodhi java ouchit. I hope I'm all fixed from next semester off campus. I need to change and I need a change. I'm hoping for the thing I have been longing for the past year. I know my friends will be happy when that happens. I know I will be happy!

[Listening to: Champagne Supernova - Matt Pond PA - Music From The O.C. Mix 4 (7:14)]

NASA - Voyager Enters Solar System's Final Frontier

NASA - Voyager Enters Solar System's Final Frontier

Our contribution to floating junk in space (ok, maybe not junk, but it'll probably be out of power/dead before it reaches intelligent life or intelligent life finds it.. Really cool nonetheless. We can finally have War of the Worlds if a species loves to kill everything and sucks the resources of the planet discovers it and knows where we live! lol..

How Normal Are You?

You Are 40% Normal (Somewhat Normal)

While some of your behavior is quite normal... Other things you do are downright strange You've got a little of your freak going on But you mostly keep your weirdness to yourself

How Normal Are You?

This is weird!!

What Does Your SAT Score Mean?

Your SAT Score of 1300 Means:

You Scored Higher Than Howard Stern You Scored Higher Than George W. Bush You Scored Lower Than Al Gore You Scored Lower Than David Duchovny You Scored Lower Than Natalie Portman You Scored Lower Than Bill Gates

Your IQ is most likely in the 130-140 range

Equivalent ACT score: 29

Schools that Fit Your SAT Score: College of William and Mary New York University Boston College United States Naval Academy University of California, Berkeley

What Does Your SAT Score Mean?

Free Association

1. Heimlich::Maneuver
   
2. Gesture::Sign
   
3. Party::Animal
   
4. Cuddle::Bear
   
5. Room with a view:: Ocean
   
6. Sebastian::German
   
7. Ooooh::Ahhhh
   
8. Sigh::Sad
   
9. Two fish, three fish::Many fish
   
10. Cake or death::Cake
    

courtesy Unconscious Mutterings

Googlewhacking: The Search for The One True Googlewhack

Googlewhacking: The Search for The One True Googlewhack

Hmm..stuff they come up with

Google Fight : coe college VS cornell college

Google Fight : Make this fight with googleFight coe college VS cornell college

This is sad!

Google Fight : google VS yahoo

Google Fight : Make this fight with googleFight google VS yahoo

Google Fight : Jennifer Aniston VS Angelina Jolie

Google Fight : Make this fight with googleFight Jennifer Aniston VS Angelina Jolie

This was interesting. I'm going to do some more and post them up too.

If Britta was around, I would be hanging out with her now. I like being around her because she likes being around me. She doesn't get tired of me. Even though we hang out a lot, I've never been told that I spend too much of time with her or I make her feel claustrophobic. I don't feel that I'm boring her either for the most part. Hanging out with her is comfortable. A cosy place where I wanna be. We like talking to each other. We always have something to talk about and she helps me relieve stresses I might be feeling at that moment. She's my buffer :). Last May term, I worked during the day and then I hung out with her in the evening till I went to bed. It was great! She is one of the closest friends I've ever had. Friends like her are very rare. I'm extremely lucky.

[Listening to: Brown Eyed Girl - Everclear - Songs From An American Movie Vol. 1: Learning How To Smile (4:21)]

I'm breathing

I'm breathing and trying to calm down. I got really emotional for no reason. I feel restless. I wanna see her but she is busy with other people. So, I haven't really hung out with her for a couple of days. We have been doing other stuff and keeping busy. She's here but I miss her. It's just weird.

It's been over 10 months. I have gotten a lot better but it still hurts sometimes. First loves are hard to forget. I don't know what about her makes me feel so strongly about her sometimes. She's going away abroad for over a year. I'm going to miss her like hell.

I heard this song for the first time and Jesse McCartney captured what a lot of people go through with their best friends. God knows how many times I have felt this way. Here are the lyrics

"Why Don't You Kiss Her"

We're the best of friends
And we share our secrets
She knows everything that is on my mind
But lately somethings changed
As I lie awake in my bed
A voice here inside my head
Softly says

Why don't you kiss her
Why don't you tell her
Why don't you let her see
The feelings that you hide
Cuz she'll never know
If you never show
The way u feel inside

Oh im so afraid to make that first move
Just a touch and we
Could cross the line
And everytime she's near
I wanna never let her go
Confess to her what my heart knows
Hold her close

Why don't you kiss her
Why don't you tell her
Why don't you let her see
The feelings that you hide
Cuz she'll never know
If you never show
The way u feel inside

What would she say
I wonder would she just turn away
Or would she promise me
That she's here to stay
It hurts me to wait
I keep asking myself

Why don't you kiss her
Why don't you tell her
Why don't you let her see
The feelings that you hide
Cuz she'll never know
If you never show
The way u feel inside

Why don't you kiss her (tell her you love her)
Why don't u tell her (tell her you need her)
Why don't you let her see
The feelings that you hide
Cuz she'll never know
If you never show
The way you feel inside...

[Listening to: Pete Jackson Is Getting Married - Less Than Jake - Borders and Boundaries (1:54)]

and something else that is a little frustrating. i don't think old friends should have problems figuring out something fun to do. i feel inadequate whenever i hear that there is nothing to do and they are in my room. it's also very obvious from their faces and gestures that they want to be somewhere else. I have never had this problem with Britta. I see her a lot(seriously!) and we still have things to talk about and I never feel like she wants to leave. Sometimes I feel that I talk to Britta more than anyone else. It also feels weird when i can't seem to find anything to talk about sometimes. I guess that means we need to move on to new and more exciting things/people. New being the keyword here.

I much rather hang out by myself than feel inadequate in entertaining people. You can't entertain someone all the time. Sometimes it's fine to relax and take a step back. It's okay to have silences. But it's not okay to space out/look around when someone is talking to you.

[Listening to: This Is Not An Exit - Saves The Day - Stay What You Are (3:58)]

i absolutely hate when people get ansy around me to leave. i get really frustrated when i see motions in people's faces and gestures that they want to leave when we are hanging out or talking. it pisses me off. usually that's the reason i get mad.

what do you do when you keep running into the same problems with someone? it doesn't seem like talking really gets anywhere. the only way i see to deal with the issues is to look past it and not solve it. i do that for a while and then eventually, the issues come out anyway and then comes bitterness. you can't imagine how incredibly frustrating it is.

and sometimes, i much rather be by myself that go for the alternatives. like, now i'm happy to be alone because i'm going swing dancing later in the night. i sure hope it's better than the last time i was there. i think if i want to get back before the dance ends, this time i will. but i'm hoping i don't get that feeling.

i wonder when jessi gets in.

[Listening to: Wrong Side - French Kicks - One Time Bells (3:28)]

may is filled with frustration. damn! this blows..

I am eating Ritter SPORT's Baileys Truffel. It's cool!

I've had a lot of time to myself for the past week. It really sucked when the internet wasn't working in the dorms because my life line to the world was cut off. Atleast I had my cell phone. I talked to sean and britta and komal for quite a bit. Sean's going to the France may term trip, Britta's home for a few weeks before Upward Bound starts up and Komal's summer is about to start. I miss them already. If they were around, I would have more people to hang out with.

I suppose I have been busy most of the day with stuff. I work as a May term class TA for physics's intro to research. I showed them how to use a micro-pycnometer which happens to be manual. And then I do lunch in between 11.30 and 12.30. And then today I had to do check ins and check outs as part of my May term RA duties. And then I went back to the lab to help out with the instrument. And then I worked out for an hour and a half. That was 25 mins of running with the rest of the time doing weights. I have to get acclimatized to exercising again. And then dinner and TV. Plus studying for GRE. I also am working on my article with Jake.

And now i'm blogging while watching Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless mind. it's a very weird movie so far.

[Listening to: Best I Ever Had (Grey Sky Morning) - Vertical Horizon - (4:30)]

Comics and Editorial Cartoons: Garfield on Yahoo! News

Comics and Editorial Cartoons: Garfield on Yahoo! News

This one is kinda funny.

and now, I am in the deadly calm mode. yikes!

I'm going to watch Blade Trinity. Hope it's decent.

looks like my dream from the night came true today. I think this is the first time that has happened. It doesn't feel very good, I don't feel very happy now. I miss Britta. I miss Kristin. I miss Mary. I'm glad Komal's here for a few more days.

While swing dancing last night, my upper lip got injured accidently. That brought an instant end to my evening dancing. After waiting for the wound to stop bleeding, i had to nurse it with ice all the night. I got back and Komal put some iodine on it as an anti septic.

I hope I feel better. I hate me being surly. And I say and do weird stuff which is embarrasing. Even though this seems almost routine, hopefully it will stop soon. It's been getting old for me and for others. It just sucks!

[Listening to: Space - On Second Thought - Don't Drive Angry (4:12)]

universal balance?

I guess I kinda believe in symmetry of things. Yin & Yang, particle & anti-particle, light & darkness. Opposites. When people are cruel or mean especially to me, I return the gesture back in different ways. I always do something to balance about my negative feelings about things. If you do something bad, you'll either hear about it or I do something to get back at you. Otherwise, these emotions fester inside me and I hate that feeling. I feel restless and moody. I much rather either talk about it or subject the person to situations where I had the sour feeling just to show them how it feels..

But I don't know if that's a good thing. There are people who still have stuff coming to them. I just haven't gotten around to it. I just hope talking solves the problem.

Now comes my problem. I'm not that mean. I can never go through with the plans I have in my mind. I usually cave in because otherwise I would feel bad/guilty later. I just can't be oblivious to things I do because I can see how the other person is feeling. I just can't be mean. sigh

I wish people were more considerate.

[Listening to: Be My Escape - Relient K - Mmhmm (4:00)]

I'm bored! I'm bored!

Finals done and nothing to do. The excitement today was my haircut! I finally lost a little more than an inch of hair. My head feels so much lighter. I can actually feel the wind over my ears. hehe.. I was going to shave but decided to do it tomorrow morning. I have done nothing all day. I have been in my room getting bored off my ass. My room needed some cleaning so I did a little bit of that. It might have been a little better if I could have hung out with some one in the afternoon. When I have time to watch TV, there is nothing on!

I can't wait till Jessi and Kristin get back on campus. I talked to both of them in the last few days. Kristin called me!! I was so happy to hear her voice. I am so excited to be living with her in the summer. She gets back sometime in the first couple of weeks of June. I really miss her and want to see her. I can more stuff with her because likes to go out and eat and watch movies. I loved hanging out with her and Mary freshman spring. I miss that time. I have never been able to go out when I want to because most of my friends since my sophomore year have been too cheap to go out. Kristin and I have to make up for missed time.

And Jessi, I'll be going out with her at some point when she gets back. She should be moving in around mid May! I remember that last time we went out to eat at the Olive Garden, I had a ton of fun. I'll be hanging out with her quite a bit too. Probably run with her too.

You can't imagine how much I want more of my friends around. Most of my friends are not going to be here for May term.

Well, I will be going to see Kit run at the home track meet soon. And then dinner. And then I don't know.

Someone please rescue me from this boredom. please.

I guess I'll be okay. I have plenty of movies to watch and I have a selection of either wine or beer. It should be okay.

[Listening to: Counting to 100 - Matt Wertz - Twentythree Places (3:57)]

This has been a pretty crappy day. The sole high point of the day was the dinner at Dr. Burke's house. I had fun there talking to Kirby and the rest. Good food, a couple of portions of wine and a beer.

I had been working on my paper for honors all day. I had to go through the books I borrowed from the library and decided to work on Classical The Dying Niobid and Hellenistic Aphrodite of Cnidus. I guess I will be concentrating on the exploitation of women in both the era depicted by the manner of the portrayal in sculpture. I found almost no sources about the Dying Niobid which was very weird. But I talked to Dr. Burke for a bit and I think it gave me a decent think-start to the paper. All I have to do is remember my conversation tomorrow morning when I get a written start to the paper.

I thought the top of the five would have served as a stress buster but I didn't have any fun there. This is the first time this has happened there. I just wanted to leave and go back to school by walk. I didn't dance very well when I was dancing either which was weird. I guess I was just too tired or bummed out or tense. I don't know what was wrong..

Tomorrow and the next couple of days are going to be really long. It's going to be painful to get through. *sigh*

I think I just need a change of scene. Makes me happy I'm going to Oakridge next semester. I can start with a clean slate. Things are going to be so different. I will be missing a few people a LOT. Atleast some of them can call me for free. I know I might be doing quite a bit of phone conversations if there isn't much to do at Oakridge..

ok, I think I need to sleep now.

Shubho Ratri (good night in Bengali)

[Listening to: A Fond Farewell - Ari Hest - Someone To Tell (4:22)]

The Sunscreen Song

Download link for the Sunscreen song (mp3)

History and Lyrics of The Sunscreen Song

This was really famous about 6 years back. A very interesting history behind this. Follow the link for more information.

Life is Short

I've had "Life is short" by Butterfly Boucher stuck in my head for a couple of days.

This is probably the most significant part of the lyrics:

Oh I am young but I have aged
Waited long to seize the day
All things said and plently done
Oh I am young but I have a past
Travelled for to find the start
Yes I am scared and I've been burnt
But life is too short

I am young but I have a past. A complicated past. But it's time to live life because I can never get these years back. I need to take advantage of my youth and make wonderful memories for the future..

[Listening to: Life is short - Butterfly Boucher - Flutterby (3:06)]

Check out the pictures I put up on my picture blog. There are about 80 new pictures from the Drag Show to April I-Club Banquet. Have fun browsing!

[Listening to: You Got Me All Wrong - Dios Malos - Music From The OC: Mix 2 (3:13)]

I had a good time today. I got to hang out with Britta, just the two of us. We ate together, walked around. We haven't done that in a long time and when I got the oppurtunity I took it. I like hanging out with Britta. I am at peace around her. I love kidding around with her. We have this bet that she would do something if I shaved my moustache off. She is tempting me, hehehe! I going to miss Britta a lot. I don't know how my life would be with out her around to be there when I need her. She calms me down when I need to be calmed down and I do the same for her.

Andy and I laughed our asses off during the soap opera bit of a local comedy troupe called CIA. Especially when they put in the lines, "Hot in Herre"," Oops! I farted again","how U doin'?". Nicole was laughing at us because we were literally in tears. The dance after that was fine. There were a ton of people there.

I just want peace of mind. I don't want to worry about anything. But what is life without tough tests? It makes us stronger. A wise person said," Everything happens for a reason. It just takes time to see the effect."

[Listening to: Blinded - Easily Amused - Novice (3:27)]

The Rogers Indicator of Multiple Intelligences

Something I found online. Pretty interesting

You scored as Logical/Mathematical. You like to work with numbers and ask questions. You learn best by classifying information, engaging in abstract thinking and looking for common basic principles. People like you include mathematicians, biologists, medical technicians, geologists, engineers, physicists, researchers and other scientists. Logical/Mathematical 96% Interpersonal 89% Intrapersonal 86% Verbal/Linguistic 79% Bodily/Kinesthetic 75% Visual/Spatial 71% Musical/Rhythmic 29% The Rogers Indicator of Multiple Intelligences created with QuizFarm.com

[Listening to: Ridiculous - P.O.D. - Satellite (4:17)]

Flunk Day!

It was finally Flunk Day today! We had been waiting forever! We were woken up at 5 am by drunk FDC members. Komal woke me up at 8 to do breakfast and I slept some more after that. I got out in the quad at 10.45 and had my first legal Flunk Day beer!! I think I had about 6 mugs of beer. Yeah, I was feeling it alright.. I took quite a few pictures with different people that I will be posting up at some point. I had a lot of fun today. barring one time that i'll talk about it now because I feel really bad about it.

Alcohol and being pissy don't go well together. I got too emotional about something very trivial and made this huge deal about it, embarrassing Andi in the process. It took me a lot of energy to get back in control and by that time i had already made her mad. I shouldn't have done the resolving pissy-ness in public (actually, i shouldn't have had to do it at all, it was nothing!). I was a complete jerk and I have been feeling incredibly bad. I have to apologize several times to Andi to make me feel better. I hope she forgives me. I can't believe how disrespectful I was.

She's on duty tonight. I hope she is doing okay. I think I will leave her alone tonight. She can hang out with other people and have fun. I guess that's my penance, not seeing her today..

[Listening to: Where To Begin - Bowling For Soup - Drunk Enough To Dance (5:21)]

something's up!

Andi has been acting weird all evening yesterday. She seemed rather evasive. She kinda pissed Lindsay off because she told her that she never ate with her anymore and it would be fun to eat with her and then sat to eat with some one else. Lindsay was not happy but didn't make too much of it. And I called Andi around 9 to just see what she was upto and the conversation seemed rather strained. And then she called me around 11 to tell me that she wanted to do some more things and if I wanted to come just for a little bit. I thought if she needed the time to do stuff, I didn't need to see her in the night and let her be. She calls me every night to say good night, and last night she didn't. I called her around 12.20 am to find out what happened and she said that she forgot. Some how I doubt she forgot and something was up. I didn't want to prolong the conversation as it was already late for her and the late night conversations are never productive.

So I don't know what's going on because till yesterday afternoon, everything was fine. I don't know if I have something to do with it or not.. I guess I'll find out at some point. I am worrying a bit about this.

[Listening to: Laid - Matt Nathanson - American Wedding OST (3:04)]

what's a guy to do?

I had planned on watching a movie with andi when she was on duty tonight. But around 8, one of my friends came up and wanted to start Flunk Day drinking because she thought Flunk Day was tomorrow. When I told them that I was going to Voorhees to watch a movie, they asked me to stay back and hang out with them. It felt like a guilt trip, and I felt really bad because I had already planned the movie and I would be going back on that. That is something I never do because I hate it when people do that to me. People think I set myself up for disappointment because I expect too much. I feel really bad when they tell me that. I feel guilty. I can almost never say no.

It's at times I like I can see fragility in some of my friendships. It's disheartening.

I wish I had just watched the movie and everything would be ok. Or would it?

And I hope flunk day is not tomorrow!

[Listening to: One for my baby - Robbie Williams - Swing When You're Winning (4:18)]

sometimes i really annoy myself. why the hell do i like to push people's buttons and then don't like the fact that they get mad or irritated with me?

also, i also annoy myself with all the white lies. i can lie with a straight face. most people can't even say that i am lying. or kidding around for that matter.

when i have god awful boring days, i feel the need to amuse myself. gets me into trouble usually.. need to work on blowing my restlessness in other things..